Dear Lost Jay,

Now that I've finally found you, there's some things I want to share...

You were so amazing. You had this greatness that everybody could see and that everybody loved. Why did I ever let you leave? Did I not realize how special you were? Maybe I was scared of the woman I was becoming because I knew that road would be a difficult one, so I let you go and I became something else instead because I thought it would be easier. I don't think that I was ready to work as hard as you wanted me to and so pushed you away. I wanted love, not to work hard and be better. So I chose love over you. But how silly of me to think that love would work without you. Because you complete me and I can't love somebody how they need to be loved if I'm incomplete.

I'm so thankful that God brought you back to me. 

Without you I feel so empty and alone, and I've been trying to fill that void, but it's you I've been looking for. You're spirit is what makes me who I am. When you left, I lost my touch. I was scared without you. I can't be great without you because you had this drive about you that pushed me to be great even when I didn't feel like being great. I lost my balance. I lost my focus. I couldn't even love properly. And it was all because I lost you... 

I wanted an easy life, and you challenged me to go after the impossible. But I'm not scared anymore because I live by faith, not by sight. I was so stuck on what I could see, not what I knew. I don't want an easy life because easy things aren't always worth it. As the saying goes, "Nothing worth having comes easy".

So I'm ready for this new adventure and I promise to not push you away and to always choose you. Because without you I'm not me...